Alpina’s latest addition has a new bi-turbo 4.4-litre V8 which is good for 447kW/800Nm, and that’s not even the most impressive thing about it.

The company claims to have given its new car’s bent-eight (which also stars in the B7) the astonishing ability to pull 2015kg of German metal to 100km/h in just 3.5 seconds.

In touring guise, the B5 bi-turbo is said to be able to hit the ton in 3.6 seconds, even with an extra 105kgs attached.

This all comes with an asterisk and some doubt from us, but the B5’s all-wheel-drive lends some credibility to the optimistic figure.

2017 Alpina B5 V8 biturbo engine
2017 Alpina B5 touring rear

A bit of maths and a few confused MOTOR staffers later, we’ve come to the conclusion there’s really no point knowing how much a B5 will cost if you can’t actually buy one yet.

With a base-price around €94,000 (about AU$132K) before imports, LCT, etc. we don’t expect the B5 to be any cheaper than its $230,000 M5 brethren. Alpinas rarely are.

2017 Alpina B5 interior dash options

There aren’t many walnut trees that have travelled at 330km/h.